


Enter the EHTRUST Extranet?

by ginnystar (ginny_star)



Category: Green Wing
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-09-05
Updated: 2010-09-05
Packaged: 2017-10-11 12:11:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 794
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/112266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ginny_star/pseuds/ginnystar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A selection of emails and their replies from the accounts of some delightful characters we love. Pre-series.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Enter the EHTRUST Extranet?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [MistressKat](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MistressKat/gifts).



> Birthday fic for Kat. Happy birthday! [Originally posted on lj, tidied up and rewritten here.]
> 
> General disclaimers apply. Not mine.

To: lionsandsquirrelsgetiton@ehtrust.gov.uk  
From: notrelationtoringo@ehtrust.gov.uk  
Subject: No peeping please.

Sent: 24/06/05 Time: 10:15

Ms White,  
As much as I appreciate your thoughts that the hospital bathrooms are in dire need of a good scrub, I must assure you that there is absolutely no need for your good self to take upon this task whilst I'm otherwise occupied in said bathrooms, nor is it necessary to do this task naked. Actually, I'd like to add that it's certainly not a good idea to do anything naked in the hospital at all.

Thanks,   
Mac

\---------------------------------

To: norelationtoringo@ehtrust.gov.uk  
From: lionsandsquirrels@ehtrust.gov.uk  
Subject: RE: No peeping please

Sent: 24/06/05 Time: 10:23

Mac you beast you,  
Don't worry your gorgeous wee self about it, just leave it all with me. Perhaps you'd like to come to my office to work out a better solution to the dirty, dirty, dirty toilets? Or dinner? Dinner at my place? I'll be waiting. And since we wouldn't be at the hospital we can play find the pink rabbit as much as we like.

Yours,  
Sultry Sue

p.s. I'm not wearing any pants.

\---------------------------------

To: theswissmakethebestlovers@ehtrust.gov.uk  
From: norelationtoringo@ehtrust.gov.uk  
Subject: Official warning

Sent: 25/06/05 Time: 14:34

Mate, the elderly patients have been complaining about your wanking off in the paediatric wards. Whilst I'm sure you find the wrinkles and loose teeth sexually arousing, I've been told that you're being officially warned about getting your little Toblerone out in front of dear old Mrs Brown. As you know whilst _she_ didn't mind, her husband certainly did and is now being treated for shock as well as a broken femur bone.

Thanks,  
Mac

\---------------------------------

To: norelationtoringo@ehtrust.gov.uk  
From: theswissmakethebestlovers@ehtrust.gov.uk  
Subject: RE: Official warning

Sent: 25/06/05 Time: 15:45

Fuck off, i was having a wank in the biddies BATHROOM, not right in front of her! It's not my fucking fault if she can't fucking tell the difference between the MENS and WOMENS!

TWAT!

\---------------------------------

To: theswissmakethebestlovers@ehtrust.gov.uk  
From: norelationtoringo@ehtrust.gov.uk  
Subject: RE: RE: Official warning

Sent: 25/06/05 Time: 15:47

Interesting, you sign your emails with 'twat'? Very astute. I'm glad you feel you can admit it to yourself.

Mac

\---------------------------------

To: astatham@ehtrust.gov.uk, wilsonhouse@ehtrust.gov.uk, c.e.o@ehtrust.gov.uk, norelationtoringo@ehtrust.gov.uk, lyndontech@ehtrust.gov.uk  
From: clorethesiren@ehtrust.gov.uk  
Subject: Meeting time

Sent: 02/07/05 Time: 10:31

Right, next meeting tomorrow morning, 9am. We need to also start thinking about putting out an advertisement for a new surgical registrar for MacCartney's team as well yeah?

Joanna,  
Head of Human Resources

\---------------------------------

To: clorethesiren@ehtrust.gov.uk, wilsonhouse@ehtrust.gov.uk, c.e.o@ehtrust.gov.uk, norelationtoringo@ehtrust.gov.uk  
From: astatham@ehtrust.gov.uk  
Subject: RE: Meeting time

Sent: 02/07/05 Time: 10:39

My darling,

I cannot wait until tonight, when I shall feast upon your sweet necter! My cock wants to mash with you and mesh and licky lick and smell you and rub you. I want you so badly, I feel, I feel agog with excitement, my love.

I am ever yours!

Alan Statham  
Consultant Radiologist

\---------------------------------

To: astatham@ehtrust.gov.uk  
From: clorethesiren@ehtrust.gov.uk  
Subject: you twat

Sent: 02/07/05 Time: 10:42

Idiot.

Joanna,  
Head of Human Resources

\---------------------------------

To: astatham@ehtrust.gov.uk  
From: norelationtoringo@ehtrust.gov.uk  
Subject: RE: RE: Meeting time

Sent: 02/07/05 Time: 10:56

Not much of a dirty talker, are you?

(By the way, contrary to what Boyce told you about emails, 'reply all' doesn't mean you're replying with 'all emotion'.)

Mac

\---------------------------------

To: astatham@ehtrust.gov.uk  
From: c.e.o@ehtrust.gov.uk  
Subject: RE: RE: Meeting time

Sent: 02/07/05 Time: 10:59

Alan, please see me in my office as soon as you receive this email.

C.E.O

\---------------------------------

To: clorethesiren@ehtrust.gov.uk  
From: dearisnotqueer@hotmail.co.uk  
Subject: FWD: help me!

Sent: 08/07/05 Time: 14:35

Well, it sounds as if you might have parental issues, Martin. Have you tried talking to her? :) Good luck!   
Kat.

see! mum, even my lj friends think you should love me more! Please please please cant i work with you at the hospital??

~martin!!~

\---------------------------------

To: dearisnotqueer@hotmail.co.uk  
From: clorethesiren@ehtrust.gov.uk  
Subject: RE: FWD: help me!

Sent: 08/07/05 Time: 15:21

Send one more email to my inbox, and I'll make sure the only way you'll be getting into any hospital is in pieces.  
And what the fuck is an lj?!

Joanna,  
Head of Human Resources

 

(end)


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